The Worst Pizza on the Planet

Evil Pizza

January 18, 2010   27 Comments

What evil mind came up with this pizza combination? Was it the corporate folks at Domino's? Or some neighborhood pizzeria trying to change the world?

The slice photographed here was bought at Antonio's here in Amherst, Massachusetts (a college town), and is called "Chicken Bacon Ranch".

We recently moved here, and I was told that this place has the best pizza in town. The number of different flavor slices blew me away.

Call me old-fashioned, but I remember when you could just get cheese and added stuff like anchovies, pepperoni, and mushrooms. When did they start putting tortilla chips and salsa on pizza?

I asked the owner which is their most popular slice and the "Chicken Bacon Ranch" won easily. So, because I'm Snack-Girl, I tried a slice. It was SO fatty. Cheese, BBQ chicken, bacon, AND ranch dressing, on a thin crust.

The calorie content is almost TWICE a regular slice of Pizza (250 calories).

It was sweet, fatty, and salty (that addictive combo of tastes that I keep mentioning). This pizzeria was actually cited in Dr. Kessler's book, "The End of Overeating". See the post here:

Would you Like To Add Some Heroin To Your Order?

I think regular Pizza is a healthy snack. And if you load it with vegetables, you are doing great! But, this pizza combination is to be avoided. I guess college students can consume the stuff because they are so active - but us 40 year olds need to stick with boring cheese pizza.

Do you think this is the worst pizza on the planet? Please share below.

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27 Comments:

That doesn't even sound good to me. But then, I am not a big fan of Ranch. :P

on January 18, 2010

When I read the teaser I was thinking "Oh, I hope she isn't going to say Antonio's chicken and bacon ranch,that's my favorite!" And voila!

on January 18, 2010

I just like plain cheese pizza as my preference anyway! I don't think I could even stomach all that grease!

on January 18, 2010

I'm not a fan of restaurant pizza, for mostly that reason (give me Amy's Organic frozen any day!) But I would have to say that the last time our office ordered pizza, the most popular varieties were Macaroni and Cheese with bacon and the taco pizza with everything. Hello!

on January 18, 2010

Pizza is on my no-no list. If it isn't real pizza it isn't worth eating so I just dream about the day when I can enjoy a slice or two or three without feeling guilty. It sure won't be chicken bacon ranch!

on January 18, 2010

Hate to say love Antonio's potato pizza Went to Mount Holyoke and visiting Amherst and Antonios was a pleasure!!

on January 19, 2010

Someone at work went to schlotskys in Eden Prairie and volunteered to get u something. The menu says sandwiches so I got a BBQ chicken with jalapeños.

It was a pizza.

Saved half for the next day but never felt full. The pizza was not memorable, but I couldn't get over not feeling full all day.

Make sure check first. Is it sandwich or pizza?

on January 22, 2010

Okay don't laugh, but my favorite pizza is the cheep 99 cent Totino's frozen "crap" pizza! Oh...so good!!! :)

on January 26, 2010

I dont think I would like that pizza. My personal favorite is Pepperoni & Bacon. But thats a no no now, so If I eat it at all its usually just cheese now. But Totino's used to be my favorite pizza too.

on January 28, 2010

Best pizza for me, hands down, has tomato sauce, garlic and oregano. Nothing else, not even cheese. But the crust has to be PERFECT.
All-dressed pizza is always the worst!

on January 31, 2010

My favorite: thin crust with onions, green peppers, pineapple, and pepperoni. So good.

on February 6, 2010

We love pizza although we are on a low calorie diet so it's a little tough to buy pizza therefore we have created our own low calorie pizza! We use La Tortilla Low Carb wraps as our pizza base and it works perfectly - only 80 calories per tortilla too!

If you are interested, we list one of my favorite recipes (Italian Veggie Pizza - only 195 calories for the entire pizza) on our site. Hope you can enjoy too!

on April 16, 2010

I like pizza, and I agree that when done right it is a pretty healthy thing. Here in Italy they have this pizza with slices of hot dog and french fries on it... It looks gross. Although I have however eaten some of the fries off of friends slices with the tomato sauce on it >.<. You can also get the fries with peperoni which can't be healthy. All in all though, you can get some healthy pizzas here (grilled eggplant is amazing on pizza).

on April 17, 2010

There is a great local eatery here in Fargo (recently moved here) called Goodfella's.
My husband gets the taco pizza, and I always get the veggie.
Pizza can be a healthy alternative ~ but like everything else in the country we're trying to see how obnoxious we can make it.

I remember the good old days too. Thankfully my 3 year old only knows it comes in veggie, plain, or pineapple / canadian bacon.

on April 20, 2010

Theres a pizza place in Peabody, MA called Bourbon Street Pizza (also called Toms Bourbon St. Pizza) That has a pizza called the Jauggernaut. This is the description from the menu, they even had to put a health warning!

Juggernaut:
Mac & cheese bites, chicken fingers, mozzarella sticks and pepperoni. *We are not responsible for any health issues after eating this pizza.

on May 8, 2010

I hope Snack Girl gets to visit the Iowa State Fair. According to the story on NPR's "All Things Considered", this state fair boasts 50 different snacks on a stick including chocolate-covered tiramisu and salad on a stick.

on August 22, 2010

I think the biggest issue with this article is not the pizza. You said 40-year olds are not active. Why does that have to be? I understand that college students have more free time and lead more active lifestyles, but finding hobbies or physical transportation might allow you to eat more that "regular boring cheese pizza."

on August 25, 2010

I think Pizza Hut Meat Lovers pizza is the worst. All that sodium content with the meat alone. Can somebody say stroke by the slice!

on September 17, 2010

I actually work at a different pizza place, and I cringe every time I have to make a chicken bacon ranch. Sometimes people seem to have a death wish and get it on deep dish crust, or ask for extra bacon and cheese.

We also make our own pesto that's almost entirely garlic butter and parmesan cheese, and people go crazy for it.

I only eat the calzones, and I stuff them with just veggies and skip the cheese.

on January 15, 2011

To save money (and calories) our family often makes pizza on Friday nights (Our usual pizza night). We have used whole wheat tortillas, spinach tortillas, Flat Out wraps, pita bread, as well as the Middle Eastern naan (delicious, but upwards of 250 cal/ slice).

on June 2, 2011

Wow. I grew up in Amherst and went to Antonio's after school regularly. It was our hang out spot. Yes, their pizza is great but can’t imagine eating them now. I love your site.

on October 12, 2011

We use naan bread for our homemade pizza. I grew up on naan instead of regular bread. It has endless possibilities like toast. We prefer naan pizza because of the crispiness of the bread and it’s easy, quick and is versatile. You can use your favorite sauce, cheese and add whatever toppings you want. My kids love adding their own preferred toppings; my 12 year old likes mushrooms, spinach and ground turkey with little jalapeño and my 5 year old like chicken and broccoli. Put it in toaster oven for 10 to 12 minutes and you have your own personal pizza. It’s great alternative to regular pizza. What’s great is that you can find naan everywhere now and they starting to make them in whole wheat.

on October 12, 2011

I use Trader Joes whole wheat doe and I top mine with fat free mozzella, mushrooms, bannana peppers and a little marinara sause.

on October 29, 2011

I have an even worse pizza! Buffalo Blue Cheese BBQ Chicken pizza. It is layered with blue cheese dressing, FRIED chicken covered in BBQ sauce,deep fried onions, mozzarella cheese, sprinkled with blue cheese. Did I forget to mention the bacon sprinkled on top?! The thought just makes me sick!

on January 24, 2012

Growing up in Chicago and Italian I never ate pizza that my Nonna didn't make from scratch by hand every Friday night. Nothing fancy: Homemade crust, homemade sauce, home grown tomatoes/green peppers/onions and fresh mozzarella cheese and a fresh green salad on the side. One of my aunts had an ulcer so pizza was normally not on her menu but she could eat this one with no side effects. Fond memories of a wonderful lady who is dearly missed even today. Oh, and by the way, when people say "Chicago Style" and refer to either Lou Malnati's or Uno's deep dish with all that garbage on it including about 4lbs. of ground meat, don't believe them. The true "Chicago Style" is a Marquerita Pizza with no meat. The way I still order mine.

on June 5, 2012

In the Philly suburbs we have Peace a Pizza. They are very creative with the toppings--such as mac and cheese, buffalo chicken (with creme fraiche!) and baked ziti. My daughter worked there a few winters ago, and it was an easy way out of making dinner, especially with her employee discount. Needless to say, it took a toll on our family weight-control efforts, even with the salads that we accompanied the pizzas with! It's amazing what you can put on top of a pizza--who ever would have thought to put pasta on a pizza. Can you say, "Carb explosion"?

on June 5, 2012

This sounds delicious! I would probably order this slice. There is also a lot of protein in this slice. It's the salt content that is the real concern for me. It must have an entire day's allowance of salt. If that was all I ate all day, fine. Cut the salt give me a thin crust and we're fine. BTW, I love Totinos too! But, the best pizza is the one made at home.

on June 23, 2013


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